Take care of me

I discovered hospitals at the age of 8 when, coming out of my art class at fagon school, i walked into a door face-first. there was a lot of blood. An ambulance came to pick me up. Inside, on the way to the hospital, the nurses gave me candies. At the hospital, while the doctors were stitching my eyebrow, one of the nurses made me inhale strawberry gas. I remember having a good time. Since then, my brain has associated hospitals with comfort and safety. from that moment on, I would often go to the hospital to experience that free attention.

After testing 1-2 psychiatric institutions at the age of 16, I  joined paul guiraud hospital in 2018. There, I met Frederick who became my friend for 2 weeks.

In 2020 I was sent to Protsiv, a countryside near Kyiv. There lies my second favorite place, the ‘recovery’ clinic. In Ukraine, as well as in other former ussr countries, detox centers are among the most profitable businesses. Some centers are free, such as religious centers. These are often closed facilities from which it is impossible to leave without permission from a guardian. Rules are military, discipline is paramount. In any case, it works for some. I stayed in this center for 6 months. Many have died since.

At the end of my hospitalization, I decided to get a naltrexone implant. This method is banned in Europe and involves implanting a capsule containing an opioid antagonist. This would make my drug use ineffective and could lead to an overdose. The implant is supposed to last for 6 months. 5 months later, I decided to test its effectiveness, but it no longer worked.

Sofiya Loriashvili is a 24-year-old photographer from Ukraine, now based in Paris. Most of her work focuses on questions of sexuality, addictions, and memory. Recently she graduated from the Gobelins photography school of Paris.